She Can't Overcome This One Bad Habit
What gets in the way of your writing — and how many times have you tried to solve it?
Dear Creators,
I have a confession to make: I still struggle with perfectionism.
I’ve read books about it. I’ve journaled about it. I’ve talked to therapists and other writers about it. I’ve even produced a bunch of Write Now podcast episodes on it.
It should be easy to get rid of, right? I mean, I don’t want to be a perfectionist — it makes me hate myself and my work, slows me down, bogs me down with (unnecessary!) rewrites, and often stops me from moving forward entirely. It is a problem that I truly wish to solve.
We humans have methods for solving problems — identify the problem, understand its roots, come up with a solution, and implement said solution.
I’ve identified that I’m a perfectionist, which means that I take myself and my work far too seriously, and agonize over every word in every sentence in every paragraph on every page. It makes my work significantly less fun and fulfilling, and wastes valuable creative energy on stuff that no one will ever notice anyway.
I understand that perfectionism is a form of fear — that when we insist that our work be “perfect,” we are terrified someone will find a legitimate criticism about it, and realize that (gasp!) we are not perfect. This creates a feeling of vulnerability, and vulnerability is scary. If you knew I wasn’t perfect, you would hate me! or laugh at me! or something! Probably!
The solution to this problem seems to be a simple dose of logic — as I noted just a few weeks ago, “perfect” does not exist. It is a subjective concept, a frozen Platonic ideal that keeps us from publishing our work because “it could be better.”
Now, implementing the solution seems simple enough — I am not (entirely) immune to logic, and intellectually, I understand that perfectionism is not only egotistical but actively harmful. I realize and accept that I am a flawed human being (as are we all!) and that nothing I create will ever be “perfect” (whatever perfect is). That creating something less-than-perfect isn’t a failure, it’s just human nature. It’s our reality.
So… why does it keep cropping up unexpectedly, in increasingly insidious ways?!
Seriously, I keep calling myself a “recovering” perfectionist, but… really, it’s just the same trick-or-treater in a different mask.
Enjoy some real-life examples:
I went back into an early Girl In Space Season 2 episode “just to fix one little thing” and ended up rewriting the entire episode — PERFECTIONISM!
I couldn’t think of anything “good enough” for this week’s Write Now podcast episode, so I put off recording until something inevitably came up and I no longer had time to record — PERFECTIONISM!
I have taken forever writing Season 2 of Girl In Space, not just because of all the rewrites, but because I’m convinced it needs to be better than Season 1 to “preserve my track record” — PERFECTIONISM!
I am not proud to admit any of this. And I realize, seeing it in black-and-white here on the (digital) page, that I really need to get over myself. That the things we create will rarely be as amazing as we want them to be. That done is better than perfect.
I realize these things. I do! And I know the solution to perfectionism is to create things that are “good enough” and move on, crafting and publishing a body of work instead of holding things back for “one final tweak”.
I’ve learned my lesson with the examples above (e.g., I’m not doing any more episode rewrites), but I suspect that perfectionism will continue to crop up in my work — if not constantly, than at least from time to time.
So I’m curious — do you struggle with perfectionism? Have you overcome it? Or is there something else that you struggle with in your writing?
I’d love to hear from you. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below, or simply respond to this email.
Words & warmth,
Sarah
Create-Along Livestream Tonight! (Weds., March 26, 2025)
You’re invited: join me LIVE on either Twitch or YouTube this evening (7:00 pm Central Time on March 26, 2025) for the very first Create-Along of 2025!
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Let me know if I'll see you there — and what you'll be working on! And if you’re not able to make it tonight, there will be another Create-Along livestream this Friday (March 28, 2025) from 5-9pm CT. I can’t wait!
"Overcome Perfectionism with This One Little Tr--oh, crap! Wait--with *This* One--no...that's not right...okay--with These Two..."
Would it help at all to know that a human out in the world (me) already believes you to be perfect? Or does that further uphold the high expectations? Because if it's perfection you want you have already been there. But if you are avoiding perfection altogether, I can understand how being considered perfect wouldn't help.
I just want you to know that no matter how you feel about a project personally, Girl in Space AND Write now have both impacted me positively. I have been dying to know what happens to X for so long I created my own second sun in a dnd campaign I've been running for a few years. Named it Ra and everything.
When it comes to curing myself of profectism I give myself projects that are a safe place to not be perfect. I'm a paper crafter so being perfect could make a difference but then I would never put a sticker down anywhere. I have so many side paper craft journals for just when I want to create. And while I can remember thinking and feeling parts could be perfected I still get to look at a finished piece and be proud.
Anyway, process isn't a straight line and can look however you need it to look.